On reflection of my poem, “Little Self Know Who You Are – A Message From Grace”, the idea that ego/personality is the paint palette of the Divine really makes me smile! It is reassuring to my ego and hopefully yours that it will not have to die in the presence of God/Grace/Source but it will be enhanced beyond measure! It may have to let go of notions of what it thinks it is so it can see itself more clearly, but it cannot die for without it we cannot not Be.
Let me make it clear at this stage; to me God is Unconditional Love and if God created me in his/her likeness then I am also, at my core essence, made of the same stuff as God…Unconditional Love. The trouble comes when I forget this. To help me remember I sometimes repeat this mantra in meditation: “God is Love, I AM Love, I AM God, You are God” This simple mantra repeated with awareness really connects me instantly with the Oneness and sacredness of my existence.
I notice how I really limit myself and my perspective when I forget this truth. Many people I’ve met have no concept of unconditional Love whatsoever…they have no idea, no experience of God, other than what they have been taught at school, and the thought of surrendering the ego to God through Grace is seen as sacrifice in the sense of loss. There may be fear of losing all of whom we think we are, a fear of God, a fear that we will lose ourselves completely, lose control of ourselves and our lives and maybe our right to choose.
With a small shift in perception we can see that if our personalities are the palette of the Divine then this sacrifice is more of the words root meaning, “to make sacred”. The dual definitions of the word sacrefice, “loss” and “to make sacred”, reflect the paradoxes of our personality. When Grace is not present we feel alone, separate, disconnected from Love and we exhibit what we see as the negative, unhelpful and fearful traits of our personality. We may feel loss, lost, like there is a piece of us missing. Here begins the quest to try and find the missing piece, fill the void…often with unhealthy relationships where we are seeking approval and trying to prove that we are Love by giving ourselves away, by being what we think others want us to be or maybe what we think others expect of us, instead of just Being ourselves. Or maybe we consume to fill the void…too much food, drink, drugs, more clothes, more shoes, more cars, guitars, whatever floats our boat, etc, etc,etc…..nothing quite hits the mark and there is always another version that might just work, drive, play, look even better! All the while we are trying to convince ourselves that these things will bring us joy…well that’s what the media tell us does it not? And these things may well give us hits of superficial joy that are unsustainable like the rush of coffee shot…the high followed by the low. Its not that these things are inherently bad for they are, after all, born out of creativity, but they need to be in their right place within our psyche.
I have observed in myself that what I see as the negative aspects of my personality are simply the opposite polarity of my positive aspects. They are therefore not really separate. My negative qualities are merely the positive ones minus Love. For example…dark is the opposite polarity to light but it is also the absence of Light. When I AM infused with Love I AM always being the best of myself. When Love is present I cannot be anything else.
I believe that our personality gives us exactly the right qualities to fulfil our purpose, and that for many our purpose isn’t necessarily a role or specific act of “doing” but of “Being” more of whom we really are. Our personalities make us a unique expression of Love and even if you believe in reincarnation, you will never get to be the same you again as you are now!
So….Who are You now? Who are You really? What unique gift is your presence bringing to life?
One of Robert Holden’s favourite sayings is, “If there is something missing in your life it is probably You”. This statement was a huge revelation for me. I realised the part of me that wasn’t showing up was my authentic voice. My inner Poet!
Which parts of You are missing from your life? How can you Be more You…more Love…right now?
…Maybe you are confusing giving love with Being Love?
To explore this conversation further you may like to read Roberts book, “Loveability”.
This week in my Yoga Therapeutics class we have been looking at the firing order of muscles in the legs. Often a neural connection goes to sleep in the originating muscle through injury or misalignment of the pelvis and a secondary muscle steps in to take over the role of the originating, injured or weak one. With awareness we can correct the firing order by retraining the weak muscle to fire first. It occurred to me just now that that when our connection to God/Love appears to be lost, the ego steps in to do a job that its not really equipped for. Like the secondary muscle, it will eventually tire! Life becomes a struggle, just as walking does when our muscles don’t fire in the correct order. The truth is that the connection is not ever lost…just our awareness of it. We can reawaken our authentic selves by shifting our awareness.
I thought I would randomly open “Holy Shift – 365 Meditations from A Course In Miracles” by Robert Holden to see if Grace and synchronicity would present another angle to support my thinking:
It is quite possible to listen to
God’s voice all through the day
Without interrupting your regular
Activities in any way.
The part of your mind in which
Truth abides is in constant
Communication with God,
Whether you are aware
Of it, or not.
Oh my…how time flies when you’re contemplating! Its 1am and time for bed….May your dreams be filled with Love and may you awake with a renewed Love of yourself and your life.